Fantasy or Reality

In my experience, generally the idea you have in your head of how sex is supposed to be is much better imagined than how it turns out to be in reality. But not always.

I'm very open-minded and have tried pretty much everything at some time or another - from monogamous hetero relationships to secret gay liaisons both long-term and short term. Some are fun, some are exciting, some are both some are none! Although each sexual encounter makes me want to have more and more sex, it's quite amazing how some fucks stay with you forever and others are forgotten by the time you've finished pulling your pants up.

Obviously your first time stays with you forever but some encounters have been a fucking disaster while others have been hugely momentous.

I once went to visit a BDSM Master. He was a lovely guy, a lot older than me - but we had quite a lot in common. He was generally a master but for me wanted to be passive. His specialty was choking people and hanging them from a home-made noose in his living room. In the fantasies the possibilities are endless - he had every type of equipment and accessory your heart could possibly desire - rows of dildos and vibrators of varying sizes, chains, ropes and gas masks. He was in his leathers and I knew he would let me do ANYTHING to him. Part of the game was him putting up a struggle obviously with me knowing that he could be submitted into doing as I required. But, you know what ... it was boring. I felt so stressed, constantly thinking what to do next - how to keep him hard and willing .. it was fucking exhausting!!! The fantasy in my head was not like that - having a guy who is willing and able to do anything is mindblowing ... in reality it was stressful and boring ... how I longed to just be in bed having a cuddle and a blow job from someone sweet!

I think sometimes the same applies to orgies - the idea of naked men all over the place masses of heaving and fucking man flesh all over the place seems fantastic in your head, but in reality I don't think it's quite the same. When there are so many naked men around - how much time is spent feeling inadequate compared to the man lying next to you?

I think the conclusion to this post is that perhaps we shouldn't think so much about how we'd like to have sex, but simply do it. Less over-analysis of how it should be and just concentrate on having a good time and making sure all involved will be back for more!