Monday, 11 January 2010

Upwards and Onwards, Honestly

Thank you again for all your comments.  Obviously the side I am portraying here is entirely my side.  I know that what works for me may not work for others.  I appreciate the time and efforts people are taking in reading and commenting.

It's a scary, yet good feeling to know that I'm moving forward with my life.  Being ill (i wasnt expecting that - part i) definitely made me realise that life is way too short not to go for things that you want.  Coincidentally, I was called this morning by a lady who had received my CV and gave me a telephone interview.  I really think these are pointless exercises which can ascertain nothing about the person you are interviewing.  I was asked to rate myself in terms of skills and ability with various computer-related tools that I use.  As I've mentioned before, I pretty much loathe myself and find it even more difficult to give myself marks for tools and applications I barely use. 

Obviously, on your CV and in job interviews everybody lies - and lying is almost second nature to me, given the life that I lead - but I never know how much to lie.  Especially when I'm being asked about how good I am with MS Project.  At least I made the lady laugh when I told her that NOBODY knows how to use MS Project - although I gave myself a 3 out of 5.  In fact, I've never used it but once did a teach-yourself course in it about 10 years ago. 

The same quandary of how much to lie relates back to my "gay lifestyle" too.  On the dating/chat websites it's quite amazing to what lengths guys will actually go to in order to meet a guy.  Sure you can knock a couple of pounds of your weight, even a couple of years of your age.  There is also no shortage of those who had a couple of cm to the size of their cock.  But some men are just clueless (and in my opinion - much worse than women). 

I once arranged to meet a guy at a deserted warehouse.  I turn up and see his car already waiting.  He had told me he was tall, stocky, even a little plump.  I have no problem with that at all.  I parked next to his car and I could see he was making moves to get out of his car, so I waited. 

What approached me was a giant of man - no doubt weighing at least 150 kilos (330 lbs for the US readers and 23+ stone for UK readers) trundling towards me - his legs were so thick - walking would be an understatement - AND he was wearing the tiniest of shorts.  I think the worst part about it was the grin on his face.  I can only assume he had been rejected so many times being honest - his only hope was to lie.  This is where lying goes too far.  I politely told him (before he had squashed himself into my car) that it was gonna happen.  I felt bad, not because he was fat, but because he had lied and I knew that there was no way he was ever going to get the male contact he obviously wants by not being honest.

So I shall wait to hear whether this telephone interview will get me anywhere (I have my doubts) or whether the personnel lady in my company will come back to me with some good or encouraging news.

In the meantime, my life moves on slowly.  The same problems still there waiting around every corner - but we always manage to deal with them - as long as we're honest (mainly!).

I'm not really one for cutsie pictures, this one just seemed to fit what I was thinking.

Still no progress with flirty office guy.  He's wearing very sexy trousers today - would love to see him out of them too.  We can only hope!!!

1 comment:

  1. I totally agree about being honest on sites! Its better to get it all out of the way online so that when/if you do finally meet face to face there will be no surprises. I don't know what that fat guy you wouldn't notice all 330# of wobbly headed your way?!? To me, its way easier to let it be known about my stats so that I don't have to see the guy's face when it shatters because I have a big ass..

    I can say that as I am a fatty myself (hence the sn!) but I am really good about looking for friends/hookups on sites where guys are LOOKING for that sort of thing. (IF you are, dear readers, head over to '' or '' for some chats...hope that's OK to mention on your blog, btw.)

    Surprisingly there is a whole gay subculture where guys -- both fat and not -- look for the bigger guys to hang out with. Its comforting to know that if you dig deep enough and long enough you can find someone who is into your particular looks, likes and even dislikes.