The musings and ramblings of a horny, married and closeted gay guy!!!!
Monday, 1 February 2010
Some See Straight in Me
It all began about 1½ years ago. Through my daughter's nursery we met a couple whose daughter quickly became best friends with my daughter. He was currently studying for his doctorate and she was in an office job. I'm not a snob, but they weren't really my cup of tea - I'm not too sure why, but they were pleasant enough and the kids got along great.
They were perhaps a little too over-friendly - it was as though the husband had decided that no matter what, we would be their friends. It later became obvious that the husband was very controlling and pretty much decided everything that went on in their house. Often at weekends they would phone us to see if we wanted to join them - sometimes we said yes, other times we didn't.
The wife was particularly timid. I think she'd had quite a difficult life, always saying how much she'd hated being at school. She was bullied at work. She had a controlling husband. She didn't even have much of a personality but was basically harmless. She often confided in my wife at how her husband was sometimes very mean to her and made all the decisions about their lives.
Basically we all began to get along very nicely, it was all very correct and easy-going. We had all exchanged emails and the wife would send me the viral internet jokes she received or send me a mail to say she ask if I'd had a nice weekend and other pleasantries.
One day about 7 or 8 months ago she sent me a mail asking about my weekend. I don't really have much patience for her so replied pretty briefly that it was nice (or something similar) but I could see that she wasn't giving up. She sent me another mail almost immediately saying I hadn't answered all her questions. I replied back saying I had just been a little busy and distracted at work.
She continued, and again sends me another mail which just said something along the lines of "Can I talk to you seriously for a minute?". I wasn't really left with much choice so I said, "yeah, sure!" Within 2 minutes she'd replied with this rambling mail that she can no longer control her feelings and she's going with her heart and not her head (yadda yadda yadda) and that she's in love with me!!
I was a little shocked (to say the least). As some of my other posts on this blog may show - I'm not really into women any more than the one I have at home (and believe me that's more than enough). No matter how much I were to try, I couldn't fancy this women if she was pickled! I suddenly realised this poor, timid woman was throwing herself at me offering me the chance to have an affair with her and it was suddenly something very "grown up".
I immediately replied that I found it very flattering (how gay!) but I wasn't in the least bit interested and as far as I'm concerned this whole issue is closed and I don't want to mention it again. She replied something like she had no intentions of hurting her husband or my wife (yeah, right!) and she thanked me for my honesty.
A day or two later I saw her but I just carried on as though nothing had happened - she was unable to make eye contact with me. After that, the whole thing went quiet for a couple of weeks when I received another email from her and again with her "following her heart" crap and she was sure she had seen "a sign" or a glimmer of hope that I was interested. I was left with no choice but to reiterate that I wasn't interested.
I guess you gotta give her credit for trying, but I just wasn't interested. Obviously I never mentioned any of this to my wife but there's still a great deal of discomfort when we're around each other. Almost as though she's undressing me with her eyes hahahahaha! Luckily I don't think she's a bunny boiler nor do I expect one night to go to bed to find a horse's head lying next to me. But personally, I think I handled the situation pretty well and in a grown up way.
I suppose I'm not as gay as I thought I was and I still manage to pull off the straight thing when needed.
I'm not sure why I wrote this post today - but it was interesting seeing it in writing!
I'm just a pretty normal married, closeted gay guy on the outside and a pretty complex guy on the inside. I've had cancer and been through quite a lot of stuff. Just looking to have fun and share my experiences with others!